We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
