At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
there is glitter all over my balls
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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