I must be too annoying 4 u.
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Randomize
