I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I am in a vortex of obligation.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize