I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
