you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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