You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
im six kinds of drunk right now
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
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