I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
