Someone shit on the floor
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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