he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Randomize
