a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
