I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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