they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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