It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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