Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
