Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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