The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Randomize
