I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
