just survived the first fart of the relationship.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize