Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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