Welp...herpes.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
