do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
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