Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
