problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize
