This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Randomize
