Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize