Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
