I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
