I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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