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• (650): View more from California

  in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.

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• (760): View more from California

  And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist

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• (619): View more from California

  I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.

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• (813): View more from Florida

  The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again

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• (+31): View more from The Netherlands

  Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night

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• (951): View more from California

  You danced?!

  (714): View more from California

  I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.

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• (916): View more from California

  You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.

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• (254): View more from Texas

  If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.

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• (817): View more from Texas

  Hey do you remember me?

  (903): View more from Texas

  You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?

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