I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize