There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Randomize
