I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
