just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
