Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
Alive.
So much puke
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
