I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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