He is such a slut. More and more my type.
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
