my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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