Kiss
Puke
I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
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