maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
