Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
