Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize
