Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
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