Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
