just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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