I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
