I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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