Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
