May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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