Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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