i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
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