As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
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